comments 25

Running in platform shoes

heelsWhat sort of craziness is this that I am promoting?

As part of my new self, I went out and scooped up a variety of high heeled shoes on eBay.  Some of them were a disaster.  Like these blue velvet Kurt Geigers, which are beautiful but too, positively dangerously, high:

geiger

 

But the above black suede Topshop platforms, are totally comfortable to wear all day.  At first, I would only wear them at work, during the holidays, after all the hordes had left.  I did fall off them several times at first before I started to get used to them.  I found that there’s a kind of knack to not showing your fear and worry that you are going to fall.  I also had to change the way I moved in order to feel more confident, so that was walking straighter, and slower, and remembering not make any sudden changes in direction.

I think though the main issue was getting used to the perspective having suddenly gained four inches.

I’m 5’2″ which is not terrible, but not great.  I’ve always played the role of the young girl, looking up at people all the time, ever the small, friendly, helpful person.  Not just because of my lack of height and the fact that I look about twelve, of course.  But these things haven’t helped.

With the help of heels, I have become an averagely tall woman.  This puts me on a par with most women I was looking up at before, and makes me taller than a good number of women I was on eye level with before.  Most weirdly, I am now on eye level with quite a lot of men.   And it makes me feel really good.  I never knew what I was missing out on, but people look at me differently.   Sometimes it’s almost as if people are seeing me for the first time.

Of course I like this change in myself.  But it does make me a bit sad.   I don’t like to think that we are constrained by the people around us.  Sometimes circumstances don’t go our way.  Sometimes times are hard.  But I like to think that we are in charge of our own destiny.  I like to think that we have control.

At the back of my mind, though, I know that this is merely comfort thinking.  We are at the mercy of those who see us:

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/this-britain/why-are-tall-women-considered-superior-to-shorter-women-6153620.html

http://www.timeshighereducation.co.uk/418067.article

For myself, I like to think that people are seeing me differently not purely because of my appearance, but because I am presenting myself differently, and holding myself differently.  I have to stand straighter in heels, hold myself more purposefully – if you waver around, you will fall off.  I have to be slower, less prone to the kind of mania that can be so retrospectively embarrassing.  I’ve found that I am thinking things through first, and not reacting to things so quickly.  Like a real, proper, grown up, in control person.  As for running in platform shoes, I realise I no longer need to.  I will just reduce any opponent to a quaking heap by turning my cool gaze upon them from on high.

This is me yesterday (look at how tall I am compared with the door!):

outfit1

I did ummmm and ahhhh a lot before posting.

Firstly, the picture is pretty basic!  All I have is a camera with a timer, a mirror ledge, and a small roomed house, where something undesirable will always be in the fore or background.

Secondly, I am wary of the idea of using my blog as self-promotion, of promoting a life that is not really mine but just the best, fantasy image of what a life like mine looks like from the outside.  I see so many bleached out, skinny angled “selfies” through Lovely Daughters’ Facebook feeds.  Many girls just post pictures of themselves fooling around with friends.  But sadly, the more insecure I know a girl to be, the more extreme the “selfies” she will post – all black and white glam, big eyes, skinny shrinking bodies in tiny tops and dresses 😦

Yesterday I came across this blog:

http://julianneqjohnson.wordpress.com/2013/09/17/blogging-tips/

Which is cool and has lots of writing and pictures on it, and encouraged me to put up picture, because it’s my blog after all, and this is a piece, however poorly lit and framed, of my life.  I know that I like seeing pictures of people whose blogs I follow.  It makes them seem more real and “connected”.

I also wanted to share how much I love the outfit… because it cost me under £35 on eBay!  The shoes are Topshop Java platforms (£20), the vest top is Country Road (£1 – any Australians reading this: we in the UK are hugely under appreciative of Country Road), the skirt is Lipsy (£5) and the jacket is Day Birger et Mikkelsen…. it’s got silk and velvet lapels and is the bargain of the century at all of… £5, would you believe it?

I was also helped in my posting by this blog post here:

http://mummytries.wordpress.com/2013/09/20/be-true-to-yourself-pocolo/

which explores the way people sometimes seek approval and affirmation from our blog postings and our use of social media sites.  It was a good read, because it reminded me to focus on my own reasons for blogging, and not to worry about what other people think.

So, as a result. I am trying to be true to myself.  Because the most important thing to me about blogging is to free my thoughts and connect with other people.

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25 Comments

  1. I am only 5ft 6in which is short for a male, when I was young I overcame this by fighting a lot. as I got older I used my mouth to overcome this. Now that I am old as dirt I just don’t care anymore. So if heels make you feel better about yourself, or anything else for that matter I say go for it. If we don’t like our self how can anyone else.

  2. I read this post with great interest, Denise. As someone who is 5 11″ and has never worn even a small heel in my life, I can’t believe the heights people go to, in their quest to look taller and wonder at the discomfort that must ensue. However, if a high heel makes you feel better, more confident – then go for it! Just be mindful of back problems later in life: something us tall people tend to suffer with as a default, without even trying!!

    • The shift in centre of gravity was a very weird feeling. I remember thinking – do tall people feel like they are going to fall over all the time?

      I suppose being short I get the choice now to be tall or short, without the attendant back problems!

  3. Denise, I love this post… you own your blog and you are looking good my girl! I hate clothes shopping and one of my friends is always telling me of what great deals she gets on Ebay. Now, reading this, I think I’ve got to get with the programme! What a bargain.
    I love, love, love the shoes too but think I would break my neck in them, although I do love wearing heels and thankfully I can wear them as Hubbie is 6ft (I;m 5ft 6in) . Incidentally, thought you might be interested to know that my boys are 6ft 4in and 6ft 5in and Aspie daughter is 5ft 9in. Are we giants or something??
    Anyway, it is so very interesting how other people percieve us and how we present ourselves to the world, as we project what’s in the inside to the outside.
    Thanks for the links which I’m going to check out. I’ve found this with blogging that it is about being true to yourself, doing what you want here. Being you. I was worried about sharing photos of myself at first too but I did share one a while ago in a post I did called ‘Champagne it is then’ and I was glad I did, albeit I was wearing sunglasses!
    It is great having a connection and without photos that is not so easy. Have a great weekend 🙂

    • Anyone 6ft 5 would be unable to get through the door in my house! You give a new meaning to the phrase “one big happy family”.

      Thanks for your encouragement about my pics!

  4. “For myself, I like to think that people are seeing me differently not purely because of my appearance, but because I am presenting myself differently, and holding myself differently” This is spot on. It’s not the shoes, it’s the confidence. And I love the pic, by the way!

  5. Your outfit looks great! I’m 5’2″ as well, so I do find that I often have to wear heels to be at the same height as others. I struggled with my height when I was younger, especially in middle & high school (thanks to other bratty kids), but I’ve come to prefer my height 🙂 Being true to yourself is most important!

    • Bah! Horrible kids… glad you came through it in a positive way.

      I enjoyed your food blog. It was especially interesting to read about how you went from using pre-made cake mix to where you are now! Really interested in the Asian cooking too.

  6. Denise, I also read your post with great interest (to borrow Jenny’s words!) I loved hearing you describe your balance in platform shoes, your not changing direction too quickly and most of all, the way you relate to people who, before, were taller than you, but now, (with the platforms), you feel equal to them. Psychologically, because of physically being more their height. I loved that. You described that very well. I also liked how you moved slowly, which, in my opinion, makes a person appear more confident. I will look up those links later. And investigate those clothes. As you know, I love clothes. Thanks for posting that. I really enjoyed it!!!

    • Yes, I like a good clothes post. I like reading blogs that have all this stuff on serious issues such as politics and feminism and serious musical artists, and suddenly you get – “look at these shoes!” It makes it all more real.

      • Oh yes, it was such a delight! Seeing those pictures especially the first one if the shoes at eye level. So serious and so reverent! I love it. I love clothes so much. Our basement is being redone so all my clothes are packed in this room (cedar closet clothes off season). And I feel deprived. Reading your post gave me the clothes fix I needed!!!

  7. Asuma

    Oooh we’re 5’2″ twins 🙂 I actually don’t own a platform shoe myself but reading your post kind of opened my eyes to it again and made me want to give it a try sometime.
    Although I have never really thought much about how tall I am or anything of that sort, but I get how being even an inch taller could completely change your outlook on your surrounding and yourself.

    • I’d always liked being short. I think it was one of those things because I didn’t think it could be any different, I thought I’d better be happy with what I have.

  8. I am now the shortest person in the house, the kids sprouted past my mere 5’8″ some years ago. I love the look of high heels, even bought a few but cannot walk in them.
    Your black pair looked great and comfortable. I’m all for anything that makes you feel good.

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